While you're at it, leave the nightlight on inside...
Once upon a time there was a girl who was minding her own damn business. At that time her business involved a lot of drinking, smoking, some sniffing, some live-music playing, hard rock-star-living-etcetera-type business. One day, she met a boy who was very pretty. So pretty in fact, that you had to say it twice. Fuck if he wasn’t pretty. It became her mission to set the hook in to this 6-8 lb Bass of the dating pond. And so, she did.
It came to pass that the pretty boy started to make the equally pretty girl feel a lot less pretty. It started innocently enough. He was concerned about her drinking and smoking (he didn’t know about the sniffing) and things in general which she may very well have been doing too much of…so she stopped. Mostly. Only drank when he did and rarely smoked in his presence…and cut all other foreign substances out of her life. She was proud of herself. However, the boy wouldn’t let her take all the credit. He reminded her about what she was doing before he met him. The drinking, the drugs, and the other boys.
He reminded her a lot.
She began to feel a little “less than.”
The girl was no quitter however, and set out to make the situation as healthy as possible. She stood up for herself. She never sat idle when he began his needling and reminding of all that was wrong with her. She told him he was full of shit. Many times. And many times he agreed. Many times he didn’t. But, she thought she could make it work…they could make it work. She did everything he asked her to do to make the relationship better. But it wasn't getting better. They weren't really even doing the things that normal boys and girls do at night with the lights off anymore. That, apparently was her fault too.
She started to notice that even though he was really good at convincing her that he was doing all the work in the relationship, that actually, in fact, SHE was the one making all the changes, doing all the work, and taking all the orders. She appreciated all he had done for her and told him as much, but for some reason, it was never enough.
Well, the weight of being the Savior of the Universe got to be too much for the boy one day, and so, he left the girl. She was sad for a little while, but very soon, a little light turned on inside her heart. It reflected off the glitter and ribbons and whatnots she had used to decorate it months before when it had been broken and she began to see again all the things the boy shamed her for were the very things that that made her interesting and loving and beautiful. They were experiences. As much a part of her as “the good” stuff that he couldn't really see.
So, she picked herself up, dusted herself off, and went and did a show.
And then she celebrated.
Then she went to therapy.
☺
It came to pass that the pretty boy started to make the equally pretty girl feel a lot less pretty. It started innocently enough. He was concerned about her drinking and smoking (he didn’t know about the sniffing) and things in general which she may very well have been doing too much of…so she stopped. Mostly. Only drank when he did and rarely smoked in his presence…and cut all other foreign substances out of her life. She was proud of herself. However, the boy wouldn’t let her take all the credit. He reminded her about what she was doing before he met him. The drinking, the drugs, and the other boys.
He reminded her a lot.
She began to feel a little “less than.”
The girl was no quitter however, and set out to make the situation as healthy as possible. She stood up for herself. She never sat idle when he began his needling and reminding of all that was wrong with her. She told him he was full of shit. Many times. And many times he agreed. Many times he didn’t. But, she thought she could make it work…they could make it work. She did everything he asked her to do to make the relationship better. But it wasn't getting better. They weren't really even doing the things that normal boys and girls do at night with the lights off anymore. That, apparently was her fault too.
She started to notice that even though he was really good at convincing her that he was doing all the work in the relationship, that actually, in fact, SHE was the one making all the changes, doing all the work, and taking all the orders. She appreciated all he had done for her and told him as much, but for some reason, it was never enough.
Well, the weight of being the Savior of the Universe got to be too much for the boy one day, and so, he left the girl. She was sad for a little while, but very soon, a little light turned on inside her heart. It reflected off the glitter and ribbons and whatnots she had used to decorate it months before when it had been broken and she began to see again all the things the boy shamed her for were the very things that that made her interesting and loving and beautiful. They were experiences. As much a part of her as “the good” stuff that he couldn't really see.
So, she picked herself up, dusted herself off, and went and did a show.
And then she celebrated.
Then she went to therapy.
☺
posted by LC Greenwood at 3:15 PM
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