Are We Breeding to Be Lonely?
Ok, so last night I was at a buddy's place recording and we got to talking about the whole Virginia Tech awfulness. And I came to a chilling hypothesis.
What if we are moving towards a society that is so individuality-driven that the Community is rendered obsolete?
We've been hearing a lot about how bat-shit crazy this guy was. And how many red flags went up around him. And there is a profound sense of "Why didn't anyone catch this?"
Well, how many times a day do we hear and say things like:
"It's none of my business."
"That doesn't concern me."
"What can I do about it?"
"I stay out of other people's kitchens."
Two stories:
1. A long time ago in a galaxy far far away (in college), I used to hang out at the beach (See The Curfew Story). Anyway, one night I was walking through the parking lot to meet my friends when I saw a group of girls circled up around one girl in particular. She was being screamed at and slapped and pushed. She was wearing glasses. She was crying. I slowed to assess the situation and how and why I should get involved. The group ended up letting her go and heading back down toward the beach. The girl walked in the opposite direction. I approached her. I didn't know what else to do, so I offered her a ride home. She refused and, still crying, took off.
I was furious. I HATE that shit. I HATE when asshole groups of people pick on people weaker than them. I started feeling all kinds of repressed rage from my gradeschool days. (These girls were younger. Early high school.)
I made a decision.
I marched down to the beach and sought out my two security guard friends. Yes, that's right. I had friends in high places.
I pointed the chicks out, told the guys what happened, and the girls were kicked off the beach.
That's all I wanted. I didn't want anyone to know it was me who did the reporting, I just wanted the garbage taken out.
Well, someone from their apparently VERY LARGE network of hoodlums saw me do it. And by hoodlums, I mean a whooooole group of kids who were students at this high school for wayward kids. And no, I'm not kidding.
Aaaaaaaand that began a summer-long feud that culminated with me getting a cigarette put out on my leg and all of my friends getting jumped while I escaped unaware, and unscathed.
The damage:
I think at least two of my friends got maced.
My friend's car window was kicked in.
Amanda got a face full of glass and I think was punched in the face at one point.
I was called and went back to the Police Department to pick them up.
They weren't pleased. To them, while what I had done was noble, it created WAY more problems than necessary.
It didn't help that I kept going back to the beach, even though cooler heads encouraged me to stay away for a while. I was too proud to give up my hang out.
But, the point is, I helped someone, and it turned out badly. So, learned to keep my nose out of shit that doesn't concern me.
2. A shorter story...but I was at a park one day with my boyfriend at the time, and I saw a group of Hispanic people and their children. One of those children, a little 2 year old, had a back COVERED in bruises. I wanted to do something. But my friends urged me not to. Saying things like "It's none of your business." "You don't know the whole story." "You could cause more trouble than necessary."
So, I left it alone. I thought "Maybe they're right. And besides, am I just jumping to conclusions because they're Hispanic? What kind of person does that make me?"
I still think about that little girl all the time.
But, it was none of my business, right?
So, here we have our buddy Cho. Clearly out of his mind crazy. Teased. Made fun of. Whatever. So were we all.
What's the answer? Do we get more involved? Or is the "mind your own backyard" mentality too strong?
How many of us know our neighbors?
I know I don't. I don't make an effort to either. I keep to myself in the big city.
Maybe it's just me.
But I do know that I see an awful lot of us out there tuned out under headphones—be-bopping our way through the world with barely a glance next to us on the bus.
Again, though, maybe that's just me.
But is there a push towards a more isolationist socialization?
Could be.
Could be why the divorce rate is so high. Maybe we're getting intolerant of other people in our space for extended periods of time. Maybe we're un-learning how to interact with each other in a constructive way.
Also...consider this:
When was the last big, nationwide movement since the 60's?
Interesting, if you think about it. Do you think the powers-that-be want another '68 Democratic National Convention where a bunch of "dirty hippies" invaded and started rioting and throwing furniture out windows?
Not only that, but it just seems as though in the face of consumerism and immediate gratification, most people can't be bothered to look outside of their limited sphere of existence.
But why? What happened?
Discenchantment?
Or is it something more calculated to keep us from a feeling of community and togetherness that renders us incapable of really rising up and affecting real change?
Hm.
But the fact is, this kid was/is a terrorist. And we have to wake up to that. Terrorism in our own country. Not based in religion per se, but race, class, status.
And what are we going to do about it? Because guess what?
This time, it IS our problem. It IS our business. It IS in our own backyard.
What if we are moving towards a society that is so individuality-driven that the Community is rendered obsolete?
We've been hearing a lot about how bat-shit crazy this guy was. And how many red flags went up around him. And there is a profound sense of "Why didn't anyone catch this?"
Well, how many times a day do we hear and say things like:
"It's none of my business."
"That doesn't concern me."
"What can I do about it?"
"I stay out of other people's kitchens."
Two stories:
1. A long time ago in a galaxy far far away (in college), I used to hang out at the beach (See The Curfew Story). Anyway, one night I was walking through the parking lot to meet my friends when I saw a group of girls circled up around one girl in particular. She was being screamed at and slapped and pushed. She was wearing glasses. She was crying. I slowed to assess the situation and how and why I should get involved. The group ended up letting her go and heading back down toward the beach. The girl walked in the opposite direction. I approached her. I didn't know what else to do, so I offered her a ride home. She refused and, still crying, took off.
I was furious. I HATE that shit. I HATE when asshole groups of people pick on people weaker than them. I started feeling all kinds of repressed rage from my gradeschool days. (These girls were younger. Early high school.)
I made a decision.
I marched down to the beach and sought out my two security guard friends. Yes, that's right. I had friends in high places.
I pointed the chicks out, told the guys what happened, and the girls were kicked off the beach.
That's all I wanted. I didn't want anyone to know it was me who did the reporting, I just wanted the garbage taken out.
Well, someone from their apparently VERY LARGE network of hoodlums saw me do it. And by hoodlums, I mean a whooooole group of kids who were students at this high school for wayward kids. And no, I'm not kidding.
Aaaaaaaand that began a summer-long feud that culminated with me getting a cigarette put out on my leg and all of my friends getting jumped while I escaped unaware, and unscathed.
The damage:
I think at least two of my friends got maced.
My friend's car window was kicked in.
Amanda got a face full of glass and I think was punched in the face at one point.
I was called and went back to the Police Department to pick them up.
They weren't pleased. To them, while what I had done was noble, it created WAY more problems than necessary.
It didn't help that I kept going back to the beach, even though cooler heads encouraged me to stay away for a while. I was too proud to give up my hang out.
But, the point is, I helped someone, and it turned out badly. So, learned to keep my nose out of shit that doesn't concern me.
2. A shorter story...but I was at a park one day with my boyfriend at the time, and I saw a group of Hispanic people and their children. One of those children, a little 2 year old, had a back COVERED in bruises. I wanted to do something. But my friends urged me not to. Saying things like "It's none of your business." "You don't know the whole story." "You could cause more trouble than necessary."
So, I left it alone. I thought "Maybe they're right. And besides, am I just jumping to conclusions because they're Hispanic? What kind of person does that make me?"
I still think about that little girl all the time.
But, it was none of my business, right?
So, here we have our buddy Cho. Clearly out of his mind crazy. Teased. Made fun of. Whatever. So were we all.
What's the answer? Do we get more involved? Or is the "mind your own backyard" mentality too strong?
How many of us know our neighbors?
I know I don't. I don't make an effort to either. I keep to myself in the big city.
Maybe it's just me.
But I do know that I see an awful lot of us out there tuned out under headphones—be-bopping our way through the world with barely a glance next to us on the bus.
Again, though, maybe that's just me.
But is there a push towards a more isolationist socialization?
Could be.
Could be why the divorce rate is so high. Maybe we're getting intolerant of other people in our space for extended periods of time. Maybe we're un-learning how to interact with each other in a constructive way.
Also...consider this:
When was the last big, nationwide movement since the 60's?
Interesting, if you think about it. Do you think the powers-that-be want another '68 Democratic National Convention where a bunch of "dirty hippies" invaded and started rioting and throwing furniture out windows?
Not only that, but it just seems as though in the face of consumerism and immediate gratification, most people can't be bothered to look outside of their limited sphere of existence.
But why? What happened?
Discenchantment?
Or is it something more calculated to keep us from a feeling of community and togetherness that renders us incapable of really rising up and affecting real change?
Hm.
But the fact is, this kid was/is a terrorist. And we have to wake up to that. Terrorism in our own country. Not based in religion per se, but race, class, status.
And what are we going to do about it? Because guess what?
This time, it IS our problem. It IS our business. It IS in our own backyard.
posted by LC Greenwood at 9:44 AM
3 Comments:
The only two movements I know of, after the 60's hippie movement, was women's rights and the AIDS movement in the early 80's. Historically, the only time movement's really happen, to my knowledge, is when enough people with enough clout are affected.
I've been reading the message boards on MSNBC regarding the shooting, and unfortunately, most of the discussion goes straight to stronger gun laws and not the fact that our healthcare system is so bad that those with profound mental anguish fall through the cracks.
Young people can be vicious. I don't quite know why. Maybe they're trying to find out who they are, but in doing so, they can destroy others very easily.
I really wish I knew the answers to this. It just makes me sad all over.
Hey, how about the fact that I put an apostrophe on "movements" when it shouldn't have one. Arg.
Sure we've all said, "It's none of my business," or "I'm staying out of it," but how many times have we said, "S/he doesn't mean it."
All of us are guilty at one time or another of saying, "I'll fucking kill him!" or "I could watch that office burn to the ground," but how often does anyone take you seriously. Yes Cho had a history of mental issues, but how many students or members of the faculty knew that? How many people would have taken him seriously if they heard him say, "I'm going to blow this campus away"?
What makes me crazy is that he had weapons... someone with weapons plans on using them. I don't see how someone couldn't see THAT as a warning sign.
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