And Here Comes the Snow.
(For an update of yesterdays entry...scroll down...)
I honestly think I am meant to live my life in a perpetual state of frustration. I simply cannot abide unreasonable people. Seriously. I've been walking around the last two days absolutely confounded by the fact that there are people who are perfectly willing to walk away from a good thing simply because they're angry. AND that once they've made up their mind, there's NO changing it. NO SIR! "Because I'm 'Mr. everything in my life has to go MY way and if it doesn't then I'm taking my ball and going home!'" Whatever. I sincerely hate inflexibility when it comes to relationships with other people.
Anyway. I was at another open jam last night. And the Orange Bowl was on the TV box. OK, so, apparently, and I don't really know that much about the "bowl system", The Orange Bowl is the biggest thing next to the Olympics. I kept saying to myself "it's the ORANGE BOWL not the ROSE BOWL...what is the big fucking deal?" Well, there must be a big deal because it was THE game to be at... as made evident with cameos by:
Puff Daddy, Will Ferrell, Ashley Simpson (more on her in just a sec), and a totally inexplicable interview with Shaq...on the field. So, I guess SHAQ is the go-to guy for up to the minute Bowl coverage. What???
Ashley Simpson. What a goddamned waste of space this chick is. Now, picture this. She's in the middle of the stadium, on a little stage, she's singing and by singing I mean lip-syncing- and jumping around like she's actually "making a statement" and meanwhile there are about 15,000 dancers doing 50 different dances around her... including what looked like Drum Majors. And Cheerleaders. Ok, now, last I checked, most of Simpson's songs are about Love and/or some kind of manufactured "pain". How do Drum Majors, Cheerleaders, and another 10,000 assholes with big billowy flags doing some kind of semaphore routine help to tell her story???
Speaking of celebrities, Mickey Mouse showed up. Or, more accurately, some asshole in a Mickey Suit jumping around and waving like the village idiot showed up. And it got me thinking. You know, Mickey IS a talking character. Much like Bugs, Daffy, Goofy, and any other of the cartoon characters one might encounter at an amusement park, football game, car dealership opening... So why don't the yahoos we see at these fucking events talk? It can't be healthy for kids.
Scene: Disney World
Sticky Child: (screaming like his/her head is on fucking fire) MOMMEEEEEEE It's MICKEY!!!!!!
(enter Frightening Life Size Mickey waving and gesturing and kicking up his heels in a jolly, jaunty way.)
Sticky Child: MICKEY!!! You're my hero!!!
Mickey: (more waving and cute gesturing to suggest that the kid is just flattering him. you know what I'm talking about. Don't tell me you don't.)
Sticky Child: How come you're not talking? Mommy, how come Mickey doesn't talk??
Mickey aka "Asshole in the Suit":... (more insane gesturing, this time suggesting that his tongue was cut out when he dared speak out during the Eisner regime)...
Sticky Child : (Screams and runs away leaving his/her parents to pick up the pieces of his broken dreams and to tell him that there's also no damn Santa.)
My point is, we have the technology. How bout if we MUST represent cartoons in real-life, let's build some talking goddamned suits.
Final Thought:
This new movie... "White Noise" aka "Desperate Grab for Last vestiges of Michael Keaton's Career" or "What One Hears When Considering Michael Keaton's Career"...
The tag line is something to the effect of "In the White Noise...the dead can come through...but so can something else.." WHAT ELSE BESIDES DEAD PEOPLE COULD POSSIBLY BE COMING THROUGH?? Dead puppies? FUCK.
I honestly think I am meant to live my life in a perpetual state of frustration. I simply cannot abide unreasonable people. Seriously. I've been walking around the last two days absolutely confounded by the fact that there are people who are perfectly willing to walk away from a good thing simply because they're angry. AND that once they've made up their mind, there's NO changing it. NO SIR! "Because I'm 'Mr. everything in my life has to go MY way and if it doesn't then I'm taking my ball and going home!'" Whatever. I sincerely hate inflexibility when it comes to relationships with other people.
Anyway. I was at another open jam last night. And the Orange Bowl was on the TV box. OK, so, apparently, and I don't really know that much about the "bowl system", The Orange Bowl is the biggest thing next to the Olympics. I kept saying to myself "it's the ORANGE BOWL not the ROSE BOWL...what is the big fucking deal?" Well, there must be a big deal because it was THE game to be at... as made evident with cameos by:
Puff Daddy, Will Ferrell, Ashley Simpson (more on her in just a sec), and a totally inexplicable interview with Shaq...on the field. So, I guess SHAQ is the go-to guy for up to the minute Bowl coverage. What???
Ashley Simpson. What a goddamned waste of space this chick is. Now, picture this. She's in the middle of the stadium, on a little stage, she's singing and by singing I mean lip-syncing- and jumping around like she's actually "making a statement" and meanwhile there are about 15,000 dancers doing 50 different dances around her... including what looked like Drum Majors. And Cheerleaders. Ok, now, last I checked, most of Simpson's songs are about Love and/or some kind of manufactured "pain". How do Drum Majors, Cheerleaders, and another 10,000 assholes with big billowy flags doing some kind of semaphore routine help to tell her story???
Speaking of celebrities, Mickey Mouse showed up. Or, more accurately, some asshole in a Mickey Suit jumping around and waving like the village idiot showed up. And it got me thinking. You know, Mickey IS a talking character. Much like Bugs, Daffy, Goofy, and any other of the cartoon characters one might encounter at an amusement park, football game, car dealership opening... So why don't the yahoos we see at these fucking events talk? It can't be healthy for kids.
Scene: Disney World
Sticky Child: (screaming like his/her head is on fucking fire) MOMMEEEEEEE It's MICKEY!!!!!!
(enter Frightening Life Size Mickey waving and gesturing and kicking up his heels in a jolly, jaunty way.)
Sticky Child: MICKEY!!! You're my hero!!!
Mickey: (more waving and cute gesturing to suggest that the kid is just flattering him. you know what I'm talking about. Don't tell me you don't.)
Sticky Child: How come you're not talking? Mommy, how come Mickey doesn't talk??
Mickey aka "Asshole in the Suit":... (more insane gesturing, this time suggesting that his tongue was cut out when he dared speak out during the Eisner regime)...
Sticky Child : (Screams and runs away leaving his/her parents to pick up the pieces of his broken dreams and to tell him that there's also no damn Santa.)
My point is, we have the technology. How bout if we MUST represent cartoons in real-life, let's build some talking goddamned suits.
Final Thought:
This new movie... "White Noise" aka "Desperate Grab for Last vestiges of Michael Keaton's Career" or "What One Hears When Considering Michael Keaton's Career"...
The tag line is something to the effect of "In the White Noise...the dead can come through...but so can something else.." WHAT ELSE BESIDES DEAD PEOPLE COULD POSSIBLY BE COMING THROUGH?? Dead puppies? FUCK.
posted by LC Greenwood at 8:45 AM
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