An Anniversary of Sorts
Tomorrow will be 2 down and 2 more to go.
It's funny how after a break up we feel the need to erase everything that happened with that person. Any concerts, trips, movies...forget about any gifts you received. I was thinking about this phenomenon (menomena) this week and realized that this time, if I do that, then I lose 10 months. 10 months. Almost a year of my life that by that logic is now a waste. When I think about it that way it seems insane to try and erase the relationship from my brain. But if i don't forget it, then I have to remember that I lost it.
Some would argue...most in fact, including myself most of the time, that I am better off. And yes. I am. I just need to figure out a way to store things so that when I'm ready I can take them out again and not lose too many specifics. Like my 30th birthday. And New Orleans.
Uck. That's it. From now on, no more significant others at personal benchmark events. God. When I turn 40, I don't care if I'm married, he's not allowed anywhere near the big celebration.
It's funny how after a break up we feel the need to erase everything that happened with that person. Any concerts, trips, movies...forget about any gifts you received. I was thinking about this phenomenon (menomena) this week and realized that this time, if I do that, then I lose 10 months. 10 months. Almost a year of my life that by that logic is now a waste. When I think about it that way it seems insane to try and erase the relationship from my brain. But if i don't forget it, then I have to remember that I lost it.
Some would argue...most in fact, including myself most of the time, that I am better off. And yes. I am. I just need to figure out a way to store things so that when I'm ready I can take them out again and not lose too many specifics. Like my 30th birthday. And New Orleans.
Uck. That's it. From now on, no more significant others at personal benchmark events. God. When I turn 40, I don't care if I'm married, he's not allowed anywhere near the big celebration.
posted by LC Greenwood at 6:28 PM
2 Comments:
It takes awhile, you know that. But when you're able, those memories will make you smile and laugh, instead of cry and dread the next day. There is no time limit on grief, and you are grieving. But when those memories pop up now and then, I hope they make you smile and remember who you were at that time. Those are the best.
I take a cheese grater to my head. Metaphorically of course. I think. And save all the good shavings. And put them in a taco. But not a metaphorical taco. A real one. With pico. And it's delicious.
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