Facing the Music
Well, on the bus this morning, as I was reading one of my favorite books "I, Lucifer"...wherefore the quote from yesterday came, I came to a conclusion. One that I've been avoiding for a while.
The Big D that rhymes with T which stands for Trouble is back.
My meds have stopped working.
"But, LC, why would that conclusion need to be avoided?"
Great question, gentle reader, and I will answer it, forthwith!
One of the perks of suffering from Depression is the belief that it's all your fault:
I'm not working hard enough to get well.
I'm being lazy.
I should be doing more.
I should be doing better.
There is no reason I should be feeling this way!
Fucking great. I'm still fucking broken. Fantastic.
Ad nauseum.
This has been going on for some time now, and because I've been trying to avoid feeling like this is all my fault, I've been trying to avoid admitting that the Depression is back en masse. With a vengence.
So, it's time to make a phonecall.
Suck.
It's probably time to change medications.
Double Suck.
The good news is, and this news is what drove me to just fucking be honest with myself already, is that today is the day I will start feeling better.
So, Pro-tip, fellow sufferers of The Sad:
If you hear your "Little Voice" repeating any of the above messages for more than 2 weeks at a time,
Hie you hence to your Doctor! There stands some medicine to make you feel better.
OK, Shakesploitation needs to open soon. Are you kidding me with all these Shakespeare references???
The Big D that rhymes with T which stands for Trouble is back.
My meds have stopped working.
"But, LC, why would that conclusion need to be avoided?"
Great question, gentle reader, and I will answer it, forthwith!
One of the perks of suffering from Depression is the belief that it's all your fault:
I'm not working hard enough to get well.
I'm being lazy.
I should be doing more.
I should be doing better.
There is no reason I should be feeling this way!
Fucking great. I'm still fucking broken. Fantastic.
Ad nauseum.
This has been going on for some time now, and because I've been trying to avoid feeling like this is all my fault, I've been trying to avoid admitting that the Depression is back en masse. With a vengence.
So, it's time to make a phonecall.
Suck.
It's probably time to change medications.
Double Suck.
The good news is, and this news is what drove me to just fucking be honest with myself already, is that today is the day I will start feeling better.
So, Pro-tip, fellow sufferers of The Sad:
If you hear your "Little Voice" repeating any of the above messages for more than 2 weeks at a time,
Hie you hence to your Doctor! There stands some medicine to make you feel better.
OK, Shakesploitation needs to open soon. Are you kidding me with all these Shakespeare references???
posted by LC Greenwood at 10:06 AM
2 Comments:
If crappy movies, wine, and maybe ice cream can help with your meds, I'll volunteer to help out. I could use a little over-the-counter self medication right about now.
I'm glad that you see that it isn't your fault, though. Few people are able to make that distinction. Few people are able to realize that they need help at all. If there's anything at all that I can do, you let me know.
I'm gonna second the mighty Bishop here. I'd be more than happy to have a 'lounge-around-in-pjs-and-eat-ice-cream-and-drink-wine-and-watch-lousy-flicks-and-laugh-one-minute-and-cry-the-next day with you. I could certainly use it as well.
Also, thank you. You are opening my eyes a bit to the thought that maybe I oughta see my doctor...
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