Thanks, Hobo!
Hooray! I'm coming down with a cold!
I passed by a homeless person yesterday who, I think, blasted me with something toxic.
I was walking down State street towards Sears. I had decided it was high time for some new underpants. Sears has some very cute options. And I must have opened my mouth to take a breath because I was walking really fast and all of a sudden I get slapped in the face and mouth with the WORST HOBO STINK I HAVE EVER EXPERIENCED.
It was fucking epic.
So epic in fact , that I believe I cried out in revulsion. Or at the very least yelped out loud.
It was awful. And I barely saw the person. I wasn't paying attention because normally when I see those people I hold my breath until I'm well out of range. Which, I know, makes me a terrible person. But this one got me. Down wind. Right in my soul. A mouthful of Hobo.
It stuck with me all fucking day long. And then other people stunk too. I was literally sick to my stomach with the smell of humanity yesterday.
Urine and Sweat. Mixed with street mung.
All day.
I passed by a homeless person yesterday who, I think, blasted me with something toxic.
I was walking down State street towards Sears. I had decided it was high time for some new underpants. Sears has some very cute options. And I must have opened my mouth to take a breath because I was walking really fast and all of a sudden I get slapped in the face and mouth with the WORST HOBO STINK I HAVE EVER EXPERIENCED.
It was fucking epic.
So epic in fact , that I believe I cried out in revulsion. Or at the very least yelped out loud.
It was awful. And I barely saw the person. I wasn't paying attention because normally when I see those people I hold my breath until I'm well out of range. Which, I know, makes me a terrible person. But this one got me. Down wind. Right in my soul. A mouthful of Hobo.
It stuck with me all fucking day long. And then other people stunk too. I was literally sick to my stomach with the smell of humanity yesterday.
Urine and Sweat. Mixed with street mung.
All day.
posted by LC Greenwood at 2:32 PM
2 Comments:
First off, thank you for using one of my all-time favorite words. The word"Mung" is nothing short of a gift to the English language.
Secondly... men wear underpants. Women wear "undergarments" or "undies" or "panties". This is to be used especially when you refer to shopping for these at stores like Sears. Nothing against Sears, but if you're shopping for unmentionables, and you use the words "underwear" and "Sears" in the same sentence, I'm starting to think you're playing for the other team.
I refute your adherence to convention and clearly, you haven't been to Sears lately.
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